Dear Ones,
You have mixed emotions – most of which are not cheerful or fun-filled. You feel as if you are slogging uphill day after day. Nothing seems quite right, and you do not have the energy to determine why. You just know waking up is not that interesting or exciting, and going to bed is a relief.
Such is to be expected. You are shedding your former persona minute by minute and creating a new being much different from who you were even a week ago.
As you shed your former being, you discover new elements of yourself and mourn what used to be.
This new being you create minute-by-minute is shape-shifting you in ways you could not have imagined even a week ago. So you feel exhausted, confused, angry, and sad, hoping for a miracle to lighten your inner turmoil. A miracle that never seems to happen—at least not in the past few days or, for some of you, the past few weeks or months. This is because you are holding your transition hostage. “No, not yet. Let me play in my known being a bit longer.”
It is past time to let go and free-fall into your new being.
It does not matter whether you completed this piece or action. Your life as you have known it since you entered the earth in this lifetime is over. Nothing you can do will stop that shift or save the pieces you want. It is over.
Those of you who savor memories for some as yet undetermined need in the future will experience the most significant fears. Because you wish to combine the two worlds, you think you are now balancing. There is no balancing act, magic potion, or wish that will allow you to keep your former life. Your former life is over. So let go and start living.
Perhaps you wonder what letting go and living mean for you. You cannot imagine a world without that person, activity, or memory. Even though your former world is becoming increasingly unpleasant, you cling to the last remaining pieces, hoping against hope you can save that relationship, memory, or interaction. You cling to the very thing drowning you with angst, fear, and often anger.
It is similar to seeing your friends graduate from high school while you are too afraid to leave elementary school. Let go and allow yourself to expand into the wonderful, glorious being you are becoming.
Perhaps you wonder what that last phrase means for you. Emotional discomfort in any part of your being indicates you are holding onto someone or something that no longer serves you, like a high school student who wants a baby rattle.
It is over. Allow yourself to accept that. And then, ever so gently, let go and let yourself live without the angst of what you once thought you wanted or should want. New times create new actions.
But before you can access those thoughts and actions, you must let go of what was. Not just a bit or even partially. Let go and dare to fly without a net. You will not hurt yourself or others, for they are also evolving. Allow them to evolve, and allow the same for yourself.
What was is no more. What is needs to be accepted. And so it is. So be it. Amen.
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