We realize that adjusting boundaries can seem daunting, especially if they’ve been in an unhealthy pattern for a long time. But healthy boundaries are essential for helping you, and everyone around you, meet their highest potentials. That is exactly why they are coming up for reexamination for so many of you.
We wish for you to know that shifting your boundaries isn’t mean when you are doing it from a conscious place, although people may accuse you of being mean or unfair as you do so. That is simply because they may be fearing change, or because they are invested in things staying the same. Shifting boundaries isn’t about punishment, it is about seeking an overall balance that is fair.
Most people who resist healthy boundaries are trying to avoid stepping into their own authentic power in some way. This is detrimental as that is exactly what you are on the planet to do! You may have noticed that when you have unhealthy boundaries with another there is a lot of blaming each other involved. When you are consumed with what another is doing, you are not putting your focus on your own growth and evolution.
In some cases, you may need to make a big shift in your relationship to stop old patterning. If you have been in a dance of unhealthy boundaries with another for a long time, you may fear this will end your relationship but the reality is your relationship, if it is wildly out of balance, is doomed to fail. Moving into healthier boundaries is exactly what will give your relationship a chance.
In other cases, you may slowly start shifting things in a way that won’t feel as drastic to others. This can start by you simply feeling into your truth before you answer or act. Ask yourself, is this fair and empowering for everyone involved? You can start saying no to others (or yes to yourself!), or start delegating activities to others that they can easily do for themselves, slowly but surely, to start to enact more gradual change. This requires commitment on your part to stay consciously aware and not fall back into old patterns.
Again we remind you that boundaries are there to support fair, empowering connection for everyone involved. That is always a good thing, and your inner wise one always knows where that point is. You may need to be very firm in extreme cases, or you may gently shift things slowly, but no matter how you get there, rest assured your boundaries exist for the highest good of all, because they allow you to use your energy much more consciously and to finally move out of old cycles and patterns into true forward movement. ~Archangel Gabriel through Shelley Young