As you continue to evolve, a theme that is coming up is moving beyond co-dependency into healthy connection. You may know that your interactions with those closest to you hold patterns that are no longer desired but don’t quite know how to shift them. This can feel daunting because many of these patterns have been well entrenched since childhood. Along with this, unconditional love can sometimes be misunderstood to mean allowing any kind of behaviour to continue in order to be loving.
Dear Ones, we have some simple rules of thumb to help you navigate the waters of creating healthier connections with appropriate boundaries. The first is, never become more invested in another person’s wellness than they are in their own. The second is, never become more invested in another person’s wellness than you are in your own.
You are seeking connection points that honour and empower everyone involved. There is not one solid unmovable line in the sand. There may be times where you need to step forward if someone is losing their balance to help them right themselves. The idea is that you always offer your support with an eye towards what will empower them to be able to stand on their own again.
Co-dependency is connected to the old conditional love model. You fear if you disappoint another they will not love you anymore. When you change the unhealthy dance you have with another they may initially resist the change and be upset. But a beautiful thing happens if you stick to your new healthier model. They will still love you despite their initial displeasure, which allows both you and them to move into the experience of unconditional love.
Your love and connection is meant to be empowering, encouraging, and supportive. It does not mean abandoning yourself or assuming responsibility for someone else’s growth. There may be times you need to lovingly step back in order for someone to discover their own divine capability. Your wisdom will always know how to proceed if you look at it through the lens of what is empowering for everyone involved. ~Archangel Gabriel through Shelley Young