“Hi Denise,My name is Alex. I’ve been reading your blogs for several years. They bring me peace, knowing I’m not going crazy. I assume you receive a lot of these messages, so I’ll keep this short.I believe in the Ascension Process wholeheartedly and can see how it has worked and is working through my life. I can feel myself moving away from a state of “doing” to a state of “being”. The problem with this is that the more the process goes on, the more I feel any and all motivation slipping away and the less I feel like doing anything. Even the things that for many years brought me great joy–writing stories, quilting, creating–now seem backed up by only the tiniest and most fleeting waves of energy, to the point where soon after starting I can’t even force myself to work on projects I would have once dove into with a joyful heart.
I apologize if this comes across as negative or defeatist, and I understand perfectly and lovingly if you don’t respond, but I’m wondering if you have any insight to share on the matter. “Being” is a beautiful and peaceful state I’ve come to treasure and enjoy, but it doesn’t pay the bills, if you know what I mean. Do you think this lack of creativity is part of the new norm, or more like we’re being put in a temporary holding pattern until a new and different phase begins?Many thanks for the work you do, and for taking the time to read this.“
This was a recent email I received from Alex who has generously allowed me to quote her/his letter here for us all. Thank you Alex. ♥
For the last ten years I’ve lived this
intensely as I know many of you have. It’s part of the Ascension
Process, but man-oh-man are some aspects of it hard on our old ego
selves! It’s not always easy or fun having to let go of past
loves and old favorites such as certain relationships, people, family,
friends, foods, drinks, activities, things to do and create and build,
occupations, careers, stores to shop at, vacations and vacation
locations and hundreds of other such related things.
In so many ways those of us living the
Ascension Process have been much like humans who’ve died and left their
physical bodies but still linger aspects of their old selves in their
favorite old places or homes etc. Ghosts in other words, and in some
ways we living physical humans have behaved like some human “ghosts” do
with things and places they once loved and were very attached to and
don’t want to let go of.
When my bodies and I entered the intense
physical phase of the Ascension Process, most of my old favorite things,
doings, actions, projects, relationships, careers, foods and such all
had to go. Not because they were “bad” or anything, but because the
Ascension Process is in so many ways a living dying/death process and
while going through it, one simple cannot eat, do, create, socialize,
work, build etc. like one did before entering this transformation
Process. You might as well stop mourning the loss of all those old lower
frequency, much-loved things, foods, activities, locations, events,
doings and people you can’t play with, work with, interact with,
co-create with, eat certain foods and celebrate holidays with, “party”
with, vacation with or whatever the case may be for you at this point.
When one is living this transformational
dying/death Ascension Process, all things of the old lower frequencies,
world, consciousness, beliefs, emotions and mentality become toxic
and/or repulsive to you. What once was your absolute favorite things and
activities, foods and drinks etc., now make you sick, causes you
physical, emotional, mental and psychic pain, isolated and oftentimes
deeply saddened or depressed. This Ascension Process forces most living
it into Hermitude just to survive what all is happening to you body and
soul, but it also forces you to repeatedly, year after year, let go of all
the old lower frequency things as well. Those things were a vibrational
match for the old lower frequency levels and consciousness; they are
most certainly not a vibration match to higher frequency levels and
consciousness and so, plenty of repeated releasing must happen within
each person living this Process.
Once one is in that space, that stage of having to let go of all they must to continue evolving, they also eventually encounter the stage I’ll call — I just don’t give a good goddamn anymore!
At first this stage of the Ascension
Process might seem like there’s something negative or wrong because
you’re so debilitated, so exhausted, so sick, so mentally fried and
incompetent, so emotionally disheveled and unbalanced that you have
to retreat into Hermitude isolation for your own survival, plus to
continue the Ascension Process. But, after a while, you naturally reach
another level within the Process where you and your old 3D ego self and
old beliefs and attitudes etc. must be transformed and released. This is
often most quickly accomplished by us reaching that point where we
simply no longer care about much of anything or anyone including
ourselves and our old lower frequency ego self. This my friends is
normal and necessary when moving through these different layers and
stages in the Ascension Process. It too shall pass so just let go of whatever
it is that’s required of you now and don’t care about the old 3D
patriarchal world of constant “doings” and float onward and upward to
the next stage and Stair-step within the Process. And, by the way, very
well done you! 
Point is that most of us need to
emotionally and psychologically reach this point of no longer “caring”
about whether we’re physically producing anything of any partiarchal
“value”–monetary or otherwise–or ‘earning our keep’, making money, paying our way, ‘carrying our brothers’, ignoring
ourselves to care for others etc. Once we reach this stage within the
Ascension Process it becomes much easier and faster to emotionally
disconnect from those old, lower frequency Collective Consciousness
belief systems and start becoming truly empowered individually
once again. But, to get there means we’ve got to reach that stage of no
longer “caring” about what the old lower frequency/consciousness
patriarchal world demanded we believe was absolute truth, valuable,
necessary and important.
Reaching that very important level within
the Ascension Process means one has de-polarized and transmuted past
suppressed issues, emotions, projections, beliefs, wounds, fears, hates,
karma etc. back into higher frequencies of Neutrality and “unity”; has
emptied-out enough of these old lower emotions/issues/stuck energies so
that the NEW higher frequencies and consciousness has a place to and can
start taking up residency within you and your body/bodies and evolving, expanding consciousness. Aah…
the payoff finally begins to all that long and lonely, isolating,
difficult, brutal, painful, confusing, toxic transmuting Inner Work!
Being an astrologer for decades–plus
having me/my birthday and ASC on cusps–it’s easy for me to grasp the
concept of cusps and the profound and usually chaotic and volatile
transitional stages of Shifting from one zodiacal sign to another, one
astrological Age to another, one dimension to another and so on. When
one is close to a cusp, one is being affected by two very different
energy constructs and influences at the same time… not to mention the
Collective’s confusion, chaos, resistance to change and so on too. All
of humanity is living this throughout their entire lifetimes in these
incarnations.
There are all sorts of “cusps” if you
will within the Ascension Process and this one about feeling
unmotivated, uninterested, uninspired, not relating to the old ways,
beliefs, systems, “doings” and activities is a huge and important aspect
of this. It’s a level and phase where our old lower frequency
ego/self/consciousness/beliefs/habits/favorites etc. are so
deconstructed by the trans-formative Ascension Process, that what’s left
of us at that point is the bare-bones soul parts minus
all the old lower frequency delusions, karma, BS, beliefs, emotions,
unresolved issues, projections, distortions, influences and such. In
other words, we transition that invisible energetic “cusp” of the old
lower and evolve or “ascend” to the Other Side, the higher dimension,
the New Age, the overall NEW. To accomplish this mighty, might task,
it’s much easier for us to first reach a point of no longer “caring”
about any of those old lower things and issues and just let go of them which frees us up to begin embodying, housing more of our Higher Selves in these bodies in this NEW now place and time.
I too have had to work my way through the different phases and levels of not caring about anything anymore
and finally get myself back to even being able to continue writing
about this Ascension Process! Those periods when I go quiet for longer
than usual are sometimes periods when I’m so removed that I have zero
interest in writing anything ever again. I’m always shocked when I
encounter this feeling in myself but have done so enough times over the
past 3.5 years to know that it’s temporary and transitional and I’ll be
back in the writers saddle again the second I’m done with the latest
integrations… whatever they are.
So, don’t beat yourself up when you feel
utterly unmotivated and uninterested in participating in ANY of the old
lower frequency social games and other related lower “normal” activities
the sleepers still believe are the end-all. Just continue through what
you’re experiencing at the time and do your best to NOT apply any of
those old lower beliefs on to yourself now. After 2,100-plus years of
Team Dark lies and cons it’s not easy to drop those old ingrained
Collective beliefs overnight. See why Team Dark told humanity the lies
they have? They all were
designed to keep humanity unaware, weak, unstable, irresponsible,
unempowered and dependent upon others to define reality for them. The
Ascension Process is the complete opposite of all that of course.
In my book The Temple of Master Hotei: A Unique Past Life Memory, Master Hotei teaches his student Ivory One about being fully active while inactive — and fully inactive while active.
It’s about action/reception, male/female, positive/negative charges
etc. of Duality reality, but how those two energies are reversed (and
eventually integrated) when worked with at the next higher level and the
next and the next etc. In other words, think about how much you “do”
and build, envision and create while in a still meditative state of
profound “not doing”.
Now think about how mentally and emotionally blank, void and
blissed-out you can become within intense, highly focused “doings” such
as creating or building something physical. While so profoundly focused
on “doing” something, you can “ascend” right out into a higher quantum,
no-time altered bliss state of “being” and you achieved that by highly
focused physical “doing”. The Yin in the Yang, the Yang in the Yin and
so on until one integrated them back and forth to such a degree that
what was fractured into two is transmuted back into a higher frequency
state of unified Neutrality instead of separated Duality. You are doing
this and more, and this is being done to you and more. Soon you will be
Neutral and unified and know it and on the Other Side of these many Stair-step cusps.
Denise
March 7, 2014
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